Sometimes, sin is simply rushed by. People say things like, "Of course you've sinned. We all have!" Which ultimately eliminates the person's guilty conscience in the matter. This one struck a cord with me. Mainly because I've heard people flippantly say, "Well, we've all sinned." almost as if it is no big deal. It's treated no different than eating food or drinking water. Sin is a common occurrence and there's no point of thinking too much about it. Or is there?
Our God is holy...
Some time ago, maybe six or seven years back, I found myself somewhere I never would have expected. I had grown up in church my entire life and at that moment I wanted nothing to do with going to church. I was desperate for God and sick of religion. I will never forget the moment that I had my 'come to Jesus' moment. God spoke to my heart and told me to go to a church that, at the time, I had come to despise. There was so much that I'd felt they had done wrong that I wanted nothing to do with it. But I went out of obedience to God.
They began singing a song about being free and dancing. As I was singing, the Holy Spirit hit me hard. Why are you even singing this song, you're not free. I was upset for being there in the first place so I stopped clapping and just thought, God, what is it that you want? At that moment, I saw myself laying face down in front of the stage. I knew that I wasn't losing my mind. I knew that God was telling me to set aside everything that I wanted and lay myself down as an act of worship. I went up to the front, terrified, and knelt down in front of the stage.
In that moment, I felt all the anger that I was holding against the leaders of the church wash out of me. I felt sorry for them. I felt sorry for the way that I had felt.
Some well-meaning ladies came up to me and knelt down by me. I was sobbing at this point and they were trying to comfort me. I didn't need or want to be comforted. All I wanted to do was sit in that moment of worthlessness because in that moment I knew how big and incomprehensible my God was.
They said something about God being able to help me through whatever it was I was dealing with and I just shook my head. I told then that I wasn't there because I wanted God's help. I was there because I was a filthy rag in his sight and that's where I needed to be. Kneeling there, worshiping Him because He was holy.
Again, with good intentions, I'm sure, they tired to comfort me and tell me that God loved me.
In that moment, I was even more saddened because they really weren't getting it.
We are dirty rags in God's sight and He continuously longs to wrap us in His arms. Who is this God we serve?
I left the church that day free from the anger and bitterness I had once felt. But burdened so much more by the reality of how blinded we, Christians, have become. Blinded from who God really is.
It is so very easy to water down the gospel message. So easy to tweak it ever so slightly to a feel-good message of empowerment. We cannot let ourselves be fooled.
Two days ago, my 11-year-old asked me what the point of life was. He said, "If we're either going to burn forever or be with God forever when we die then what is the point of our lives right now?"
I wanted a really good answer but I found myself in the same predicament that King Solomon expressed in Ecclesiastes. Everything is meaningless. I said, "Elijah, I don't really know what the point of this life is since things are going to happen whether we are here or not. All I know is that we need to live our lives to give God glory because He is God and He deserves it."
Do it for the glory of God
God, I don't know why I was simply overcome with emotion today but I thank you for this reality. Thank you for awakening my mind over and over again to how holy you are. Lord, clean my conscience daily. Show me where I have taken my own path instead of furthering your kingdom. Cleanse my heart and fire up a passion in me. Give me boldness and wisdom to speak of the sin that enslaves us and of You, a mighty God above all other gods that is worthy of our praise. That is holy and just. That has provided us salvation from our slavery to sin. That has made a way for us to be free. Amen
A New Identity
What is this blog about? You mean, I'm supposed to have a purpose? Ok, if that's required then my purpose is life.
Better with age...
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